Day 4: Being A Good-Girl Is Hard Work

28 08 2009

Okay, I must admit that for the last 4 days I’ve wanted to eat everything in sight that wasn’t nailed down.  That’s not exactly true, I don’t overeat a ton, but I do frequently make point-unfriendly food choices and this week I’ve just wanted to eat things that were not point appropriate.  I’m so glad I’m taking the weekends off.  Today, was no exception and unfortunately I gave in and had a double McDonald’s experience – which didn’t help my plan or my mood in general; ah the fleeting  joys of eating crap cuisine.  Tomorrow morning I weigh in and I will know my starting point for losing 101 pounds, plus I’m going to have the hubby take the official “before photos” – urgh, not looking forward to that.  So many parts of my body look like ham hocks that you’ll want to throw me in a pot and make some split pea soup…but I digress.

So today, even though I ate all take-out food/fast-food I stuck with it all day.  I’m proud of me because I wanted to go off so bad.  I don’t exactly know why?  Perhaps it’s so much structure that I want to buck it at times.  I dunno, I have 361 days to figure it out.  On the health side, I called the physician and they still haven’t received any of the results from the stress test so I’m still waiting…patience is not one of my virtues either.  Basically I want to know so that I can get my act together with exercising.  Oh well, tick tock.

Even with some of my problems today I stuck with it and managed to come out a winner in the end.  Plus, I even put my Project Runway on hold to finish Lesson 4 of my German on Rosetta Stone. I’m proud of myself how much I’ve remembered, however it is getting harder.  I need to keep it up and keep going – I do think I’m driving Jim crazy naming all the things in the room that I know the German word for.

Now, to watch my Project Runway…

Oh, and I put out a call to my friends on Facebook to see if anyone is courageous enough to eat my first culinary adventure in Rick Bayless’ Mexico…I’ll let you know who takes the bait (going to make it on Sunday).  In the meantime, here’s what I ate today:

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Morning
2  cup(s) water 0
2  item(s) Breakfast Breakfast Burrito 14.5
Subtotal 14.5
Midday
1  serving(s) Musselman’s Healthy Picks Raspberry Acai 1
10  piece(s) Chicken McNuggets, Large 12
24  fl oz Diet Coke 0
Subtotal 13
Evening
1  serving(s) Subway Club Salad 2
1  serving(s) Subway 2 Half Cirlces of Provolone 1
2  serving(s) Subway Olive Oil Topping 2.5
Subtotal 5.5
Anytime
3  cup(s) water 0
20  item(s) Baked Sour Cream & Onion Potato Chips 3
Subtotal 3
Food POINTS values total used 36
Food POINTS values remaining 0
Activity
No entries for activity.
Activity POINTS values earned 0
Check off these important items daily:
Liquids
Milk & Milk Products
Fruit & Vegetables
Multivitamin/Mineral
Healthy Oil
Activity
Lean Protein
Whole Grains

Now tomorrow is weigh in day.  Always good to know where I’m starting out!  Write again on the morrow.





DAY 3: Stress Tests and Other Nonsense

27 08 2009

ECG-Stress-Test-RT-2000-.13212322Brilliant me went to bed last night at around 9:30 because of the pounding headache that wouldn’t quit and couldn’t be cured by my Excedrin Migraine because of the caffeine content and my scheduled stress test for the next morning.  Like a good girl, I had successfully avoided caffeine since Monday and have been on a water kick which truly helps my WW goals too.  Other instruction from the scheduler was to eat nothing after midnight the evening before and come to the test on an empty stomach.  Simple enough.  Problem is, that on any normal night I wouldn’t even bat an eye or think about eating after midnight and I may go without breakfast until later in the morning or what-have-you.  Well, last night, all I dreamt about was eating.  Eating and then freaking out because “Well, I can’t take the test now, cause I ate!”.  Funny stuff.  Also, I really wanted breakfast this morning…I supposed there is something about the old adage “you don’t want until you can’t have”.

So, I get my jazz pants (left the jazz hands at home), sneakers and headed out the door at 6:30 AM.  Testing started at 7 AM.  I arrived there and sadly was probably the youngest person getting one of the exciting nuclear stress tests this morning.   Naturally, a lot of the older people kept asking me if I’ve had a heart attack.  “No, no…I told them, I just have a pretty strong family history of heart disease and have had some symptoms we’re wanting to check out.”  I felt like I was giving interviews.  Three of us got ushered into the first room where we were all told to put on the “these open in the front” gowns, but we still got to wear our pants and shoes (whew).  Still, there I was, with a hospital robe on, not looking stylish.  We were all seated and given the run-down on the tests we were about to receive.  All three of us.  At the same time.  I felt like I was in one of those football movies where the coach gives you the rundown before the next half.  We each got our IVs put in (mine in my hand because I’m a VERY deep person – at least vein-wise). Then we were escorted into a waiting room that unfortunately was playing Faux News.  We had to sit for 30 minutes and drink 2 glasses of water.  Hey, that’s two glasses outta my six I have to drink for WW, so SCORE!  Then they take you for your first “scan” where you have to lay still for 20 minutes, and again when you HAVE to be still it seems harder.

After the drinking, dawdling and then scanning, they escort you into the room with the treadmill.  You get asked by the nurse why you’re here. I dunno, I have a family history and some disconcerting symptoms, etc….  Then the put a utility belt of connectors on you and hastily prep your chestal region for the electrical connections.  By the time I was wired up, I looked like the bionic woman, without the cool sound effects.  They then put a blood pressure cuff on and have me sit for a little while to get base readings.  My base reading was normal.  Then onto the treadmill.  That’s when the interesting thing happened.  It appeared that when my body started to exercise or go under the “stress” of exercise, my blood pressure skyrockets!  Add the second injection of radioactive materials.  We note that my blood pressure goes WAY above normal with the stress added  Interesting.  When I got off the treadmill I went back to normal.  So, that might be something interesting for my doctor to look at (I’ve already googled the issue and think I may have a few self-diagnoses picked out but I’m not saying anything until I hear from the person with the degree).

After that, we get to finally have some cookies, juice and story time (I’m sorry that was just the Faux News channel in the background).  The second scan then happens and you do your best to stay still for another 20 minutes.  After that, you put your clothes back on and it becomes a waiting game.  That, seems to be the hardest part for me – I want to know so I can go from here.  Alas, I am just stuck waiting to hear from my physician.  In general, though the situation did cement some things for me.

1) If I do have to do some work getting my heart back in shape, then I’m glad I’m doing this 365 challenge.  Losing the weight will be a huge help to lowering my blood pressure if that’s needed.

2) If my heart does need some tuning up, it might be good to forgo some of the more invasive options for my husband and I getting pregnant until after the weight is dropped.  This means it’s a good kick in the pants for me to get on with doing this weight loss thing.  I mean, if I’m going to postpone and lose another year of fertility, I better make this count.

3) I feel much better going to get these things checked out, because my mother did not.  Already, I’m ahead of the game.  I wish she had taken better care of herself.  I so need her here…still.

After the interesting morning, I lunched with a very good friend and went back to work.  Proudly, I stuck with my eating plan all day and calculated the pizza I ate at lunch as best I could since it’s a family owned pizzeria and I have no idea what it would look like.  Also, I got my multi-grain in for today! WHOOPIE!  In addition, I did more of my Rosetta Stone lessons.  I’m on my way!

OH, did I mention that I got the call yesterday and I’m taking the cooking class on the 31st!  Woohoo…goal down.  Okay, so after my long boring story, here’s the goods…thanks for reading and thanks for givin’ a crap.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Morning
1  package(s) Zoo Animal Crackers 2
2  cup(s) water 0
1/2 cup(s) fresh orange juice 1
Subtotal 3
Midday
1  cup(s) canned tomato sauce with tomato tidbits 1
1  cup(s) mushroom(s) 0
1  cup(s) red onion(s) 0
4  serving(s) Pizza Crust Mix 13.5
4  serving(s) Fresh mozzarella ball (packed in water) 6.5
2  cup(s) water 0
Subtotal 21
Evening
1  cup(s) water 0
1  serving(s) Panera Asian Sesame Chicken Salad 9
Mulitgrain Baguette – Quick-added food 3
Subtotal 12
Anytime
No entries for this meal time.
Subtotal 0
Food POINTS values total used 36
Food POINTS values remaining 0
Activity
No entries for activity.
Activity POINTS values earned 0
Check off these important items daily:
Liquids
Milk & Milk Products
Fruit & Vegetables
Multivitamin/Mineral
Healthy Oil
Activity
Lean Protein
Whole Grains




DAY 1: Mise En Place – Life Preparations

24 08 2009

So, today marks the first official day of a 365 day journey that will undoubtedly be one of the hardest things to maintain. However, I have decided that time only keeps moving forward. I’ve wasted so much time thus far, that I don’t want to waste any more.  I cannot.  Part of the reasoning for this decision to “journey”, comes from a “reality check”.  You see, I won the genetic lottery (note sarcasm here), whereby both of my parents appear to have some cardiac related issues.  I know for a fact that my father has; however, my mother died suddenly at the age of 58 for exact cause unknown.  Why?  My father did not want to have an autopsy.  I understood at the time, however looking back it’s left me with more questions unanswered than answered.  Let alone not having her with me here on this earth to ask questions of, get her support and unconditional love.  I miss that more than anything.  Needless to say, the cause of death was ruled to be a heart attack.  Was it though?  I don’t know.

So right now, I’m getting some tests done to see if my genetics, paired with my complete lack of disregard for my body has damaged myself.  Until recently my blood pressure has been a solid 120 over 80.  However, I’ve recently had some recurrent pain in my left arm and twinges in my chest and pain in my upper back (shoulder blades).  The arm pain was a common complaint I often heard from my mother.  She used to just say “I must have slept on it wrong,” or insert whatever good excuse you can think of.  One troubling addition in the similarities between my Mom and I is that when we exert ourselves (exercise, dance, whatever), we both get very red in the face.  Always have.  It didn’t worry me until this summer when I began dance classes in full again after 10 years of dabbling with it.  I went FULL OUT on the routine and ended up with a searing head ache and a throb that had a hard time stopping.  I paid for my attempt to relive my youth.

So, that paired with the arm pain led me to my physician.  Whom after an exam and an EKG decided I needed to have a stress test.  Things were moving way too fast!  I was actually looking for another physician due to just wanting a physician closer, and I had an appointment set up to meet with a physician my friend at work recommended.  I went.  After a thorough interview and another EKG it was decided yes, it would be a good idea to go ahead with the nuclear stress test.  So, that’s on deck for Wednesday.  I am, scared; but I am hopeful.  I am also glad that I’m checking this stuff out before it takes me outta this world much unlike my Mom who should have taken better care of herself.

So, as I embark on this journey it’s going to take a little time to get all the elements into place.  I have been half-heartedly attending WW for weeks now, but I’m serious about sticking with it Monday through Friday, no if, ands or butts (and mine is big enough for everyone).  I won’t use my 35 bonus points during the week because I’m taking the weekends off.  I had a plan to full-force start on my exercise tonight, however some chest twinges made me think twice.  I’m having the stress test on Wednesday, so if I get the all clear, I’m going to jump right into the exercise plan that I’m looking at.

I ordered my Rosetta Stone system which should be here tomorrow (sure hope there are no glitches in being Mac compatible).  I plan to get my German lessons underway tomorrow if I don’t spend the entire night trying to figure out the software.  I also called and have my name on a waiting list to take my 1 culinary class per month for August 31st at the Glass Bazaar.  Class is Backyard Pleasers…I’m praying someone drops out so I can take their place. If not, I’m stuck for a culinary class this month.

I stuck very well to my WW plan today however, even though at times I wanted to just say – “the hell with this.”  I made a deal with me, I need to stick with it.  I still have to take my multivitamin today and sadly didn’t get in a whole grain item but it’s a start.  I weigh in on Friday, so that will be the start point for my 101 pound loss.  I’m hoping to pick out my “recipe attempt” tonight too to make this weekend.  I think I’m going Mexican…but will keep you posted. Right now, the laundry is calling me so I need to go to it.  In the meantime, I am working out my mise en place for this life-challenge, and I think, within the week we’ll have everything ready for the full efforts.

In the end, I’m just a girl who doesn’t want to find out if fat girls die young.  I want to really be present in this life and I’m hoping that a year of focus will help me shed a lot of things that continue to hold me back and gain things that I have always wanted.  Simply, here’s to day one.  Thanks for reading and please feel free to let me know what you’re thinking or doing if you’re on life’s journeys too.

Here’s what I ate today:

Monday, August 24, 2009

Morning
1  serving(s) White House Healthy Plus Pomegranate 1
Subtotal 1
Midday
1  serving(s) Panera Chopped Chicken Cobb Salad 12
1  serving(s) 2oz Panera French Baguette Side 3
1  cup(s) water 0
Subtotal 15
Evening
1 1/2 serving(s) Stouffer’s Chese Manicotti 11.5
1  small slice(s) Thin Crust Cheese Pizza, Medium 4
Woodchuck Hard Cider – Quick-added food 4
Subtotal 19.5
Anytime
2  piece(s) chewing gum, with sugar 0.5
2  cup(s) water 0
Subtotal 0.5
Food POINTS values total used 36
Food POINTS values remaining 0
Activity
No entries for activity.
Activity POINTS values earned 0
Check off these important items daily:
Liquids
Milk & Milk Products
Fruit & Vegetables
Multivitamin/Mineral
Healthy Oil
Activity
Lean Protein
Whole Grains